P: Hello, DanAndPhilGames psychotic flowers!D: Hello! (laughs) Right? And welcome to what may now be… the final episode of our Undertale Let’s Play! P: (sings fanfare) D: The longest Undertale Et’s Play of all time. P: “Et’s Play.” D: “Et’s Play!” P: Now you may have seen from the video length that this is a long ‘un. D: It’s a long ‘un!P: So grab yourself a hot cocoa… D: It’s an emotional roller coaster.P: …climb under the blanket… …get some snacks… D: And prepare yourselves.P: Just get ready to hang out with us… …for the end of Undertale. So we did the Flowey fight last night, and I was trying to fall asleep, but all I was seeing was – D: (imitates Photoshop Flowey)P: Crazy fighting creatures! D: Yeah, that will literally mess me up forever. P: I was lying in bed with my eyes open like “I cannot sleep now.” D: So I know that you guys are probably the experts in everything Undertale, but as you know, this is our first time playing it.P: We don’t know what’s going on. D: We were expecting that to be the end, and yet today, we are continuing past the end of the game. So I’m sure you know what’s about to happen, but we have no idea. P: We don’t know what’s gonna happen!D: Here we go! I’m like, literally scared to open the game now in case Flowey’s like – P: “HELLOOOOO!”D: “Heh-heh-heh, you thought I was wrong? Nooo!” P: Is that what my voice should be like?D: Yeah. P: (laughs) My Texan accent is very variable. D: You need to be like (gruff Southern accent) “Well, I thought blah blah blah.” Well, you know, you voiced him in the first episode, so here you are, you get the main antagonist. Well done, Phil. (both imitate dramatic Undertale music) D: I’m gonna be, like, weird when this isn’t a part of our life anymore.P: I know! What will we do with our time?D: “The End”…OR NOT! So what is our first port of call here? ‘Cause when Flowey was getting all like, “(sobs) YOU SPARED ME!” P: Yeah?D: He said, “Y’all weren’t nice to Alphys.” “Go sort that out.”P: So we need to go back to the lab. D: And say, “Hey, there, I know you’re really creepy, and you didn’t apologize for the creepy things that you do, but now everybody in the game and the comment section is saying that we need to be nice to you.” P: So let’s go give Alphys a good ol’ hug! D: I’m gonna go on some epic wikiquests learning about the lore of the Undertale universe after this. P: Do we have all our items again as well?D: Uh…let’s see! P: Yeah!D: Yeah! Pfff – we’re ready for the fight whenever that happens. P: What if there’s other fights, though? D: Well, then we’re ready for those. P: Fast-forwarding to the Hotlands! (fast-forwarding noise) (Snazzy singing of “UNDERTALE”) D: Yooooo. P: Should we include that?D: Yeah. P: (laughs) That’s what we do when the camera isn’t on. D: Right? (both laugh) P: Why did we wear sweaters? It’s such an unseasonably hot December. D: It is, honestly. I’m gonna be sweating at the end of this. Oop! We’re being called by somebody!P: This is new!D: What?! D: What? What?! (Undyne voice) “Hey, uh, this is Undyne!”
(Undyne voice) “Hey, uh, this is Undyne!” “Shut up, Papyrus! This was your idea!” I need a “Nyeh-heh-heh” in the background.P: (Papyrus voice) “Nyeh-heh-heh-heh!” D: “Human! You have to deliver something for me.” “Uh…please?” “I’m at Snowdin in front of Papyrus’s.” “See ya, punk!” P: Well, that’s something else we’ve gotta do now as well!D: Side quest deux! P: I feel like we should do that first, ’cause it just told us to. D: Really? Before we s – well, maybe it’s, like, something for Alphys. P: Yeah, exactly. D: This is when Dan now gets lost trying to get back to Snowdin and spends four and a half hours ending up back at the ruins.P: See you in 2019! D: (Still with the snazzy singing)P: (clapping on the beat) D: What is the identity of that guy?P: I don’t know! D: I feel like that’s another mystery somewhere. Game full of mysteries.P: It’s us. (dramatic music)D: (gasps theatrically) P: I feel like all these little monsters are our friends now. D: I know!P: I see them and I’m like “Awww!” D: I literally – like, why would you want to go back to the human world after this?P: Yeah! D: What up? (Undyne voice) “Ummm, so I have a favor to ask you.” “Uh, I need you to deliver this letter to Dr. Alphys.” P: Ahhh! See? Good call.D: Good thinking, Phil! “Huh? Why don’t I do it myself?” P: Look at her little face!D: That is a great face. “W-well, it’s kind of personal, but we’re friends, so, uh…” “I’ll t-tell you…” “HOTLAND SUUUUCKS! I don’t wanna have to go over there!” “So here you go.” P: Question. Would you read the letter?? If you were given it by Undyne? D: “Oh, and if you read it…” “I’LL KILL YOU.” “Thanks so much! You’re the best!” I feel like this game bloody judges you.P: Yes. It probably knows if you read it. D: So, yeah, I’m gonna not, and then watch someone else’s Let’s Play where they do and are a horrible person. P: (Papyrus voice) “Undyne writes a lot of letters.” “But she can never seem to find the right words.” “So when she goes to deliver them herself…” “She always quits so she can go back and rewrite.” “That’s why she asked you!” “Because you have no standards!” (Ooohh Roasted) Thanks, Papyrus!D: (cracks up) Oooh! Wow! True, though. (Undyne voice) “So? What are you waiting for?” “The sooner you get it over with, the better.” P: All right! Let’s go!D: All right then. They seem to really be telling us to go deliver that letter. P: Yeah – but what is it like in the inventory? We don’t have to read it, we can just have a little sniff of it. D: We can check it, maybe.P: Check it. ♫ Check-check-a check-a check-a check-check. ♫ D: “Info.” “Unique ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). Letter written for Dr. Alphys.” And that’s all we’ll know!P: That’s all we’ll know! D: That’s all we’ll know. P: D’you know, I think a cat rubbed against me last time I wore this jumper, ’cause I’m feeling particularly wheezy. D: Feeling a bit – (wheezes)P: Yeah. Heeeeere we is!
Heeeeere we is! D: ♫ “The door has no mail slot.” ♫ ♫ “Slide the letter under?” ♫ ♫ Slide! Slide! ♫P: NO!!!! D: No!!!! “You’ll keep the letter warm for a little longer.” P: Aw, let’s just slide it under. Sliiiide! D: BANG BANG. Come out, you neet.P: Come on! Please! (Alphys voice) “O-oh, no, is that another letter?” “I don’t want to open it.” “C-can’t I just slide it back out?” D: Well, you could, but that’d be really awkward, ’cause we’re still stood here.P: Yeah, please don’t do it. “No, no, I can’t keep doing this.” D: No!P: “I’ll read this one.” D: Yes, Alphys! Come on!P: Read it! “Um…it’s shut kind of strongly, isn’t it?” D: (screams) You can imagine Undyne licking it with the force of a thousand dragons. P: Open the door! You strange dinosaur! Here we go. “Hey, if this is a joke, it’s – ” D: Oop! Look who’s there! P: “Oh my god!” “Did you write this letter?!” D: N – UMMM, ooohhh, okay, here we go. Uh-oh.P: Nooo! It wasn’t us! “It wasn’t signed, so I had no idea who could have – ” D: Oh, god, what’s Undyne done!? P: “Oh my god.” “Oh no!” “That’s adorable!” “And I had no idea y-you, um, wrote that way!” D: Toto is so expressive. You have no idea, Alphys. P: “It’s surprising, too. After all that gross stuff I did…” D: (snorts) At least Alphys is admitting the Mettaton stuff is gross. P: “I don’t really deserve to be forgiven.” D: If she apologized, and said, “Hey, sorry about making the whole robot go after you, but I like you, can we be pals?” I’d be like, “Yeah!”P: That’d be good! “Much less, um…” “This?” D: (laughs) WHAT DID IT SAY?! P: “And so passionately, too.” D: Oh, for god’s sake. P: “You know what, okay! I’ll do it!” D: Oh god.P: “It’s the least I can do to make it up to you.”D: OH NO. P: “Yeah! Let’s GO ON A DATE!” D: Undyne wanted to go on a date with Alphys! Literal OTP right there.P: Aw, amazing! P: Is this a date? Both: “DATING START!” (crack up) D: Sure. Bet this is gonna be the hardest fight in the game. P: “Uh, sorry! I’m still getting dressed!” D: Okay.P: Dating loading. Awwww! Amazing!D: You look frickin’ amazing. P: “How do I look? My friend helped me pick out this dress.” D: I can imagine Mettaton EX just being like,
furry games download D: I can imagine Mettaton EX just being like,
D: I can imagine Mettaton EX just being like, “YOU LOOK FABULOUS!” P: “She’s got a great sense of…” “Um…” “Anyway.”D: Who’s the friend then?P: I don’t know. D: Dating.P: “H-h-hey, wait!” “Actually, we still can’t start the date yet!” D: Why? Both: “Dating…STOP?!” P: “Um, I’ve got to give you items to raise your affection statistic first.” D: Oop, here we go.P: That’s a bit weird. “That’ll increase the chance of a successful outcome to the date!” D: Alphys really needs to just go with the flow and not try to manipulate events using science. P: “Anyway, don’t worry! I’m prepared!” D: Sure.P: “I’ve been stockpiling gifts in anticipation for a date like this!” D: (laughs)P: “First, I’ve got…” D: Yeah?P: “…some metal armor polish.” D: Niiiiiice, yup.P: Nice, good one! “Um, maybe you can’t use that.” D: Undyne would’ve, though.P: Yeah. “But…I also brought some waterproof cream for your scales!” Yeah, that’s not gonna work either.D: Yeah, not a fish. P: “Your…uh…scales…” D: Mmm, no, Toto isn’t a scaly. P: Toto should just say that it’s not us that we’re meant to be dating!D: I KNOW! Toto’s like me, like, “I’M IN A SOCIAL SITUATION. BUT I CAN’T TURN BACK NOW. I’VE GONE TOO DEEP – OH GOD I’M ON A DATE! I’M RUBBING OIL ALL OVER MY SCALES!” P: “Well, how about…” “This magical spear repair kit, that I…” Um.D: Wow, I wonder who Alphys was preparing to go on a date with! Hmmm! P: “Hey, let’s forget about the items!”D: Yeah? P: “Let’s just start the date!” D: Here we go. Both: “DATING START!” P: “Yeah! Let’s, uh… Date!” D: Let’s! Uh! Date! P: Helloooo? How do we date? Oh, no, the sweat is coming. Both: “Uh” D: (laughs)P: “Do you…” “…like…” D: C’mon.P: “Anime?” Yes we do!D: Yes! Yes we do! Great start, great start, okay! P: “Hey, hey, me too!” D: (laughs) This is…this is too real, I can’t right now. P: “Hey! Let’s go somewhere!” “But where’s a good place to go on a date?”D: Oop. P: “I’ve got it!” D: Where?P: “Let’s go to the GARBAGE DUMP!”D: (cracks up) P: Why would you choose the garbage dump?!D: ‘Cause we’re all anime trash. P: “Here we are!” “This is where Undyne and I come all the time.” D: Don’t wanna know.P: “We find all sorts of great stuff here, heh.” “She’s really…” “Uh…” D: (laughs) Resourceful.P: “Oh no!”
Resourceful.P: “Oh no!” “That’s her over there!” “I – I can’t let her see me on a date with you!” “Why? Because, uh, well…” “Oh no, here she comes!” D: Uh.P: Uh-oh! D: (claps) CASUAL UNDYNE! P: Incredible! D: We have, like, the same outfit.P: You do! D: What can I say. Great minds think alike. P: You need to get those boots, though.D: I do, I’ll buy some Uggs. Or not. P: Look at the little dog in the background.D: Heh. Woof! (Undyne voice) “Hey, there you are!” “I, uh, realized if you deliver that thing, it might be a bad idea, so I’m gonna do it.” “Give it to me!” “Huh? You don’t have it?” “NGAAAAAAHHH!” “Have you at least seen her?!” P: I think we should be honest. D: Alphys is currently trembling behind the trashcan.P: Okay, maybe not. D: Okay, so are we supposed to be honest and pure all the time? P: I think this – D: Or are we supposed to be friends with Alphys by lying slightly? P: I think this is a good situation to say “nope” because we’re trying to get Alphys to be more of our friend. D: On your head be it. “No?” “But she wasn’t at home?” “Where the heck could she be?” P: (laughs) D: I’d be terrified.P: Yep. D: Say thanks. P: “Oh my god.” “W…well, I guess it’s obvious, huh?” “I…uh…” “I really like her.” “I mean, more than I like other people.” “I’m sorry.” “I just figured, you know, it’d be fun to go on, like, a cute, kind of…” “Pretend date with you to make you feel better?” D: Yep, sure, okay, this isn’t awkward at all. P: “Well, it sounds even worse when I put it like that.” D: Yeah, it really did. P: “I’m sorry, I messed up again.”D: (cracking up under his breath) P: Alphys, can you do anything right?! D: Okay, she’s us, Phil. You need to relate. P: “Undyne’s the person I, um, really want to go on a date with.” “But, I mean, she’s way out of my league.” “N…not that you aren’t, um…” D: (cracks up again) OH FOR GOD’S SAKE. P: “B…but Undyne…”D: Stop dragging us! P: “She’s so confident.”D: Uh-huh.P: “And strong.”D: Uh-huh.P: “And funny.” D: Funny? P: “And I’m just a nobody.”D: Mm-hm. P: “A fraud. I’m the royal scientist, but…” “All I’ve ever done is hurt people.” D: I mean, I’d say that Mettaton EX has inspired millions of people around the world, so I don’t know about that.P: Yeah, I think it’s a good thing! “I’ve told her so many lies. She thinks I’m…” “She thinks I’m a lot cooler than I actually am.” D: Does she?P: “If she gets close to me, she’ll…she’ll find out the truth about me.” D: No, Alphys! She’ll love you for who you are! P: “What should I do?” D: Tell her the – P: TELL HER THE TRUTH! D: Keep lying?P: (laughs) No.D: Tell her the truth. P: “The truth?!”D: Which we’re saying after just telling a lie. I’m just putting that out there. P: “But if I tell her that…” “…she’ll hate me!”D: No!P: “Isn’t it better this way?” “To live a lie where both people are happy?” D: Nooooo. P: “Or a truth where neither of us are?” D: You need to be authentic! P: “They say ‘be yourself…'”D: Yes!P: “…but I don’t really like who ‘myself’ is.” D: We all love you, Alphys. P: “I’d rather just be whatever makes people like me.” D: What is she doing that would make people like her? That’s what I’m kind of struggling to…okay, whatever. P: “Eh-heh…heh…” “Heh…”D: (deep voice) “Huh.” P: “No, you’re right.” “Every day I’m scared.” “Scared what will happen if people learn the truth on their own.” “They’ll all get hurt because of me.” “But how can I tell Undyne the truth?” “I – I don’t have the confidence.” “I’m going to mess it up.” “How can I practice?!” D: “Let’s – “Both: “OBVIOUSLY Let’s Roleplay.” D: Let’s be nice. “Let’s Roleplay It.” P: “R…roleplay?” D: (mouth clicks) Here we go. P: “That actually sounds kind of fun!” D: Don’t act like you haven’t done Kitty Mew Mew roleplay on the forums, Alphys, I know your game. P: “Okay, which one of us will be Undyne?” D: “I’ll Be Undyne.”P: That’ll make things less confusing for me. “Oh, right, obviously. Ehehehe.” “Ahem.” “Hi, Undyne.” “How are you doing today?” D: Why is…P: “YoOoUuRr CuuUte.” D: “Yo! Ur, cute.”P: (laughs) D: So should we try to act like Undyne, or just be nice to her?P: I think just be nice, yeah. D: “YO ur Cute.” P: “Thanks! You say that to me a lot, and I never know what to say…” “But I know you just mean it platonically, because we’re just friends!” D: (cracks up)P: “Ehehehe!” “Uh, so I’d like to, um…talk to you about something.” D: Yeah, what? “Then she – ” OKAY OKAY OKAY WAIT WAIT! Are we typing this like a fanfiction writer? Just like, “YOU LOOK CUTE. THEN SHE KISSES YOU.” “THEN YOU RUB BUTTS.”P: (laughs) D: “THEN YOU GET IN THE BATH AND BREAK OUT THE MILK!!!!” No, okay, that was a bit too fast.P: Oh my god. D: I went from naught to 100 too quick.P: Wow. All right now.D: I’m okay, I just need to get my head out of Wattpad. Are we going down the crazy fanfiction route?P: Yes, it’s funnier. D: I hope this doesn’t ruin the ending that we’re going for!P: I don’t think it will. D: “ThEn…ShEeE Kisses You!!!” P: “WHAAAAT?!” “UNDYNE WOULD NEVER, UH…” “I kiss her back. S…softly…” D: (cracks up) OH MY GOD. WE’RE FUCKING EROTIC ROLEPLAYING WITH DR. ALPHYS, WHAT HAS THIS GAME DO – We’ve gone literally from that terrifying Flowey beast in the last episode – P: Yeah – D: – to erotic roleplaying.P: I know. D: Welcome to Undertale, everyone. P: “S…softly.” “I…look gently into her eyes…” “I START HOLLERING!” D: (laughs) You can see, like, the monitor glare as two people are like, sexting it up.P: Yeah. “UNDYNE! I LOVE YOU! UNDYNE! KISS ME AGAIN!” Oh no! D: “WHAT…did you just say?!” P: “U…Undyne! I was just…” D: “Hey, whoa, wait a second!” “Your outfit’s really cute! What’s the occasion?” “Wait a second.” “Are you two…” “…on a DATE?”P: Uh-oh. “YES!” D: NO! Tell the truth!P: Nooo! Don’t say that, say that we said – say the truth! “I mean, uh, noooo!” “I mean, we were, but – “D: Yeah, yeah? P: “I mean, actually we were only romantically roleplaying as you!” D: (facepalms)P: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. D: Well. This is really a test if Undyne will like Alphys exactly as she is.P: Yeah. D: “WHAT?!” P: “I MEAN!” “I mean – Undyne – I – ” “I’ve been lying to you.” D: “WHAT?! ABOUT WHAT?!” P: “About, well, everything.” “I told you that seaweed was, like, scientifically important.” “Really, I just use it to make ice cream!” “And those history books I keep reading, those are just dorky comic books.” “And the history movies…those, those are just, uh…” “Anime!”D: (snorts) P: “They aren’t real!” “And that time I told you I was busy with work on the phone,” “I was just eating frozen yogurt in pajamas!” D: She’s too relatable. “Alphys…” P: “I…I just wanted to impress you.” “I just wanted you to think was smart and cool.” “That I wasn’t some nerdy loser.” D: “Alphys.” Hand on the head. Rub-rub.P: Awwww! “Undyne, I…I really think you’re neat, okay?” D: “Alph – ” oh my god. Oh my god.P: The feels! D: This is the fanservice that none of us deserve. “Shhhhhh.” Both: “Shhhhhh.” P: She picks her up. (laughs) Oop. Into the trash. D: (cracks up) Literally just slam-dunks her! “Alphys!” “I…I think you’re neat too, I guess.” “But you gotta realize.” “Most of what you said really doesn’t matter to me.” “I don’t care if you’re watching kid cartoons or reading history books.” (pretentiously) WHOA. Anime isn’t kid cartoons.P: Yeah, excuuuuse me.D: It’s important art from the other side of the world. “To me, all of that stuff is just NERDY CRAP!” “What I like about you is that you’re passionate! You’re analytical!” “It doesn’t matter what it is! You care about it!” “100 percent! At – “Both: “MAXIMUM POWER!” D: “So you don’t have to lie to me.” “I don’t want you to have to lie to anyone anymore.” “Alphys, I want to help you become happy with who you are!” “And I know just the training you need to do that!” Oh, shit, it’s gonna be the cooking again. Yes, Alphys, sweat. P: “Undyne, you…” “Y-you’re gonna train me?” D: Oh god. “Pffft, what?” “Me?!” (fanfare) P: Oh, look who it is!D: Ohhhhh, not another – f – g – “Nah, I’m gonna get Papyrus to do it.” BOOOOM. P: “GET THOSE BONES SHAKING!”D: Oh, god. P: “It’s time to jog 100 laps, hooting about how great we are!” “Ready? I’m about to start the timer!” P: “U…Undyne, I’ll do my best!” (laughs)D: I would really just pay to see an OVA of that.P: Yeah, me too. D: “OH MY GOD!” “She was kidding, right? Those cartoons, those comics…” “Those are still real, right?” “ANIME’S REAL, RIGHT?” Oh, god. P: Don’t want to break the news!D: Are we about to break the news that anime’s not real to Undyne?P: Nooo! “Anime is real.”D: “Anime is real.” P: (giggles)D: “HA HA HA! I KNEW IT!” “GIGANTIC SWORDS! MAGICAL PRINCESSES! HERE I COME!” P: Yaaaay! D: (coughs) “Thanks for taking care of Alphys.” “I didn’t get to say what I wanted to, but things seem like they’re going to get better for her.” “Well, gotta go catch up with them. Later!” P: Bye. Awww! That was amazing. I’m glad we did that. D: Wow.P: Yeah. D: Sure, okay. This is where we met the, uh, angry garbage dummy…P: Yes. D: …that was the friend of the Napstablook and Mettaton or whatever.P: Save it! D: (dramatically) “Partaking in worthless garbage…fills you…with DETERMINATION.” P: Same. Oop, here we go!D: Ring, ring, here we go again. P: “Howdy! If it isn’t my good friend, who trusts me!” D: Yes. P: “This is Papyrus, your also mutual friend.”D: Indeed. P: “Alphys and I finished our training early.” “Very early.” D: Did Alphys die after five laps?P: Like one lap. “So I sent her home. Very home.” “Uh, now I feel strongly, and for no apparent reason, you should also go…there.” “To her lab…house.” D: (snorts) P: “I have only good feelings about this. Goodbye.” D: Click. P: Is everyone trying to help us do the right thing now?D: I think so. I feel like the game is – i – we’d really have to mess up quite hard to do the wrong thing now. I like that the house is still on fire after the date.P: (laughs) It still burns. Where is the nearest boat? D: How’s Blooky doin’ in the post-game? Still making those CDs? P: Blookypops!D: Yeah, you work on that mix CD! Allllphys, let’s have a chat. P: Are you home? Have you got that switched on still?D: Still spying on us, okay. P: Great.D: I mean, whatever, sure. P: I feel like more snacks are on this table now.D: Did she apologize? The Mettaton hole. Classic.P: Hello, Mettaton. D: Oop, here we go! P: Have we been in here before? This is new. D: OH MY GOD. (robotically) “WARNING. WARNING. ELEVATOR LOSING POWER.” P: Is this the end?!D: “ALTITUDE DROPPING.” P: Oh my god.D: Imagine if it just closed the program again. P: My worst fear. Toto!D: Is this Papyrus’s fault? P: If that happens, you’ve just gotta jump, and you’ll be fine. D: (laughs) I don’t think that’s how physics works, but sure.P: That’s what I heard! Oooh, what’s this?D: Well, this is ominous. What’s gonna happen now?P: Euhhh. What a mess. D: (robotically) “ENTRY NUMBER ONE.” P: (Alphys voice) “This is it. Time to do what the king has asked me to do.” “I will create the power to free us all.” “I will unleash the power of the soul.” D: Is this where we find out the weird dark past of Alphys, and on our quest to say “Okay, we accept your apology” we find out she’s done even more messed up shit?P: I hope not. D: “ENTRY NUMBER TWO.” P: “The barrier is locked by soul power.” “Unfortunately, this power cannot be recreated artificially.” “Soul power can only be derived from what was once living.” “So, to create more, we will have to use what we have now.” “The souls of monsters.” Oooooh.D: Interes…ting… “ENTRY NUMBER THREE.” P: “But extracting a soul from a living monster would require incredible power.” “Besides being impractical, doing so would instantly destroy the soul’s host.” “And, unlike the persistent souls of humans, the souls of most monsters disappear immediately upon death.” “If only I could make a monster’s soul last.” D: Where is this going…? “ENTRY NUMBER FIVE.” P: “I’ve done it.” “Using the blueprints, I’ve extracted it from the human souls.” “I believe this is what gives their souls the strength to persist after death.” “The will to keep living, the resolve to change fate…” D: (falsetto) Determina-tion! P: “Let’s call this power…DETERMINATION!” Good call.D: I’m scared. P: What are we gonna find in here? (ominous, ethereal music) Creepy. D: Were we just supposed to, like, go upstairs and interact with this?P: I don’t know. The “True” Laboratory…D: The true laboratory! P: What does this mean? D: I thought that her laboratory just being Mettaton behind a wall, an anime pit, and a creepy spy computer was a bit thin.P: (laughs) Yeah. I think so. What’s the plant?D: This ficus needs some water. P: “It’s a fake plant.” Oh. I should probably get some of those. D: If it’s a fake plant, why does it look so bad? P: Yeah.D: Just puttin’ that out there. P: Good question.D: Vending machiiiiine, give us the juice – Buy chips?P: Yes!D: We don’t have 25G. P: Oh. (laughs) That’s really sad. We can’t even afford chips. D: “There’s a note on the ground.” P: “You can’t make it all out…” “Elevator…lost power…enter the center door.” Both: “That’s all you could read.” D: Ominous. (robotically) “POWER ROOM.” The power room.P: Let’s not go there yet. D: What’s over here? P: Helloooo? Oh, and the thing. D: (robotically) “ENTRY NUMBER SIX.” P: A S G O R E D: You don’t need to keep doing that now that we’ve met the big oaf. P: “Asgore asked everyone outside the city for mosters that had fallen down.” “Their bodies came in today.” D: Those are monsters! P: “They’re still comatose…and soon, they’ll all turn into dust.” D: Hmmm.P: “But what happens if I inject determination into them?”D: What. P: “If their souls persist after they perish, then…”D: Then…? P: “Freedom might be closer than we all thought.” This is very dark. D: “ENTRY NUMBER NINE.” P: “Things aren’t going well.” “None of the bodies have turned into dust, so I can’t get the souls.” “I told the families that I would give the dust back for the funerals.” “People are starting to ask me what’s happening.” D: Oop. P: “What do I do?” D: Watch more anime.P: Yeah. D: “It’s some kind of operating table.” WHAT THE FUCK?! P: “It’s sticky.”D: A STICKY operating table. D: Great.P: How grim. D: (rolling the R) Grrrrrreat. P: (poorly attempting to roll the R) Grlrlrlim. Wash your hands. D: “You turned on the sink.” Did we turn on The Tap?P: Yeah. You’re gonna make it flood. P: (laughs) What is that? (demonic scream) P: OH!D: U M. P: Something drew near. D: (falsetto) ♫ What the fuck is that. ♫ Is this the operating table slime?P: Maybe. D: They’re glitching out in the same way that Flowey did!P: Yeah, that’s weird! Check! D: Uh.P: No data available… D: Oh god, what’s going to happen?P: WHAT THE HELL IS THIS. D: Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.P: Watch out watch out watch out watch out watch out P: You’re fine? You’re fine. D: Right.P: “But nobody came.” D: This is creepy. Cell? P: “You take out your cell phone.” “You can hear voices through the receiver.” (whispered) “Come join the fun!” D: Okay, this has literally just turned into a horror game.P: I’m scared. What is happening?! (the Amalgamates garble vaguely) D: I thought this was supposed to be the nice, be nice, now everybody’s just friends fanfiction ending period of the game! P: Join? D: Refuse! I don’t want to join it!P: Okay. P: “That’s a shame.”D: “It’s a real get-together.” D: Oh god.P: Oh my GOD. D: This – (laughs) This is so c – ! Oh my god, I swear all of the fights and all people and things have just become so creepy! “It doesn’t care anymore.”P: Spare! D: “You won!” We earned nothing. But…D+P: “There’s a red key!” D+P: ooOOooo! D: ♫ I’m scared. ♫ Oh god.P: What is that?! D: “There is a note on the ground.” “You can’t make it all out.” P: “drain…dropped it…” D: “That’s all you could read.” P: Oh – that’s, like, the key to the sink, right? D: Luckily, we interact with everything. D+P: “Click!” D: Oh god. P: Oh – there’s four different colors that I bet we’ve got to find.D: I see! “ENTRY NUMBER TWELVE.” P: “Nothing is happening. I don’t know what to do.” “I’ll just keep injecting everything with determination.”D: (snorts) P: “I want this to work.” D: Uh. “ENTRY NUMBER THIRTEEN.” P: “One of the bodies opened its eyes.” D: Are we literally about to stumble across some zombies or something? Well, this is literally the creepiest thing ever. D+P: A dog bowl… D: Don’t tell me she was injecting Temmies with determination. P: Maybe that’s it.D: They don’t need any more sugar. “Seems like a comfortable bed.” “Lie on it?”P: Yes! Maybe there’s a ghost in there again. Um. Can you get off it? (dramatic incidental music) D: (screams) P: Oo! Hello…? That was weird! D: What happens if we just stay here?P: I don’t know. Maybe it’s just watching you sleep or something. D: OH MY – That better be a hand.P: (laughs) P: What’s it doing?! Is this gonna kill us? D: I saved it. D: That just made it look even mo – P: Aw, it tucked us in! Well, that was creepy. D: OKAY, THAT WAS FUN. Interact with every bed. “There’s – ” oop, see? Told you!P: Yeah, there you go! P: It’s a key!D: (snorts) D: I was joking then! Like, “Oooo, ughhh, I’m gonna interact with every bed in the room!”P: That’s what you should do! D+P: “The clock is broken.” D: Mmmm. Stuck at 3:00. The most ominous of all times. P: (hums dramatic incidental music) It was my favorite time at school. D: “ENTRY NUMBER FOURTEEN.” P: “Everyone that had fallen down…” “…has woken up.” “They’re all walking around and talking like nothing was wrong.” “I thought they were goners…” D: Do we go in there?P: Uh… D: Put in another key? P: OH. More things to do.D: Oh my god. Intimidated. P: Like a maze.D: Very large. P: Oo! D: That means that someone’s looking at us through the other side. P: “Golden flowers.” D: If Alphys has literally anything to do with Flowey… …I’ll be betrayed. “ENTRY NUMBER SEVEN.” P: “We’ll need a vessel to wield the monster souls when the time comes.” “After all, a monster cannot absorb the souls of the other monsters.” “Just as a human cannot absorb a human soul.” D: Did Alphys create Flowey? And maybe that’s what this is?P: Yeah, maybe. P: “So then, what about something that’s neither human nor monster?” Maybe it is! D: “Entry number ten…” P: “Experiments on the vessel are a failure.” “It doesn’t seem to be any different from the control cases.” “Whatever.” “They’re a hassle to work with anyway.” “The seeds just stick to you, and won’t let go.” That’s what Flowey is! What is this? D: I bet something’s gonna – P: Oop!D: …jumpscare us from the mirror. P: Hello, Memoryhead!D: HelloooOO (both scream demonically, mimicking the Amalgamate) D: Yup, that’s a lit – P: Oh my GOD. That’s what I look like when I wake up.D: (laughs) D: “MEEEEHHH WHAT IS HAPPENING?!” Well, it’s good to know that Alphys has literally tortured all of these souls or whatever. D: It’s a – “fleegableegashmeegablglslflslegbgbg”.P: “Bllliblashoobaskdsdfkd.” D: Same. P: “Shneeboo shnooboo.” D: (falsetto) That’s disturbing. Hellooooo. (screams demonically, mimicking the Amalgamate)P: (laughs) D: Oh! It literally got EATEN BY MOTHS! Like that wasn’t the creepiest thing that’s EVER HAPPENED. P: “Clean” is what my mind wants to go to. D: Well, there’s a lot of things here. Let’s mystify it. D+P: “You did something mysterious.” P: “Flobbashloobashleeben.” Oh my god! D: It’s literally like a horrible franken – P: It’s your worst nightmare.D: Yeah! D: Alphys has just been Frankensteining – P: Yeah – D: – and by that I mean Frankenstein’s MONSTER, before you’re all like (mocking voice) “FRANKENSTEIN WAS THE DOCTOR.” – all of the animals together. D+P: “You wash your hands.” P: “Nothing happens.” D: So there’s no Woshua in there.P: “Ooshnoo booshnoo.” P: Oh my god!D: ♫ Ooshnoo booshnoo nooma nooma yay… ♫P: This is very weird. D: ♫ Nooma nooma yayyy. ♫ P: ♫ Nooma nooma nooma yay. ♫ D: Pray.P: Pray. D: Because it’ll be the angel one. P: “You kneel and pray for safety. … remembers its conscience.” “Shpookeekakalalkabub!” Right, oh my god. D: The moths are probably my least favorite mechanic in this fight. P: eeeeeEEEEEE Pick on? “You pick on a Reaper Bird.” “Reaper Bird seems to remember something!” BOTH: “Someone finally gets it!” D: “Ribbit ribbit.” P: “Courage.” D: Oh, more moths. Great.P: Oh god. D: Love the moths. Moths are great. Just frickin’ love moths. Moths are my favorite animal.P: (laughs) D: NOOOOT! He seems placated. P: “You won!” D: WOWWW! I’m gonna go save it. P: Yeah, save it. P: Keyhole.D: Here we go, note on the floor: P: “You can’t make it all out.” D: “Cold…” “That’s all you could read.” “It’s some kind of switch. There’s a blue-colored hole in the center.” Don’t have the blue one, we’ve got the yellow one.P: Ohhh, we have the yellow one, okay. This is huge! D: Well, Alphys must have been up to some seriously shady shit down here.P: Yeah. P: WHAT the frick is this? D: Well, this must be the cold place. There’s icicles in the air.P: It’s the Silent Hill room. D: “ENTRY NUMBER ELEVEN.” P: “Now that Mettaton’s made it big, he never talks to me anymore.” D: Ahh, what a big star. Got his own resort. P: “…except to ask when I’m going to finish his body.” “But I’m afraid if I finish his body, he won’t need me anymore.” D: Awww. Yet, also, kinda what’s wrong with Alphys. (cough) P: “Then we’ll never be friends ever again.” “Not to mention, every time I try to work on it, I just get really sweaty.” D: (snorts) Alphys needs to believe in herself!P: Yeah! D: Her normal, anime-loving… …child-stealing, monster-injecting, Flowey-creating, self is lovable from everybody.P: Yeah. Definitely. You gonna press X on every fan? Oh, is that a button? D: There’s a switch!P: “There’s a switch on the wall.” D: Press it?P: Yes!D: Boop! P: Oh my god, are we gonna get blown off the edge now? D: Is it gonna fart out – P: Oh, it’s making a monster!D: Here we go… D: Another terrifying beast. What will this one look like? P: Hello, friend. D: Oh!P: Doggo! D: It’s like the nasty dog beast! (sound like a thousand dogs howling in the distance) P: “It’s the Amalgamate.” D: All right, check it. P: “Play”, we should have done. D: “It’s unclear how many dogs this counts as.” Oh, here we go, I bet this is not gonna be your typical dog. P: This is not the doggo that I want to play with! Go back to the pound! D: Literally just flew into that one. Play with it?P: Yeah. D: It’s not excited yet.P: Oh, you have to pet it first. D: OH! It’s a rocket dog. Okay, this is strange. P: It’s a rocket dog with no face. “Smells like a bunch of dogs.” D: (laughs) Great smell. So I have to beckon it over…P: Yeah. D: All right.P: “You call the Amalgamate.” D: (falsetto) Good Amalgamate! Here we go! Come over here!P: (falsetto) Come on! P: “It bounds towards you – ” D: (panting aggressively, mimicking the dog) “…flecking a strange liquid from An Orifice.” P: Just…one of the orifices.D: Sssssssexy. P: ♫ Dodge, dodge, dodge the doggo, one-two-three-four-five ♫ D: ♫ Good song, for the doggo, ouch ouch ouch I’m scared ♫ BOTH: It’s “Hovering Close”. P: “Pet!” D: Now we pet it. “It convulses rapidly.” (imitates a dog having a seizure) Same. That’s what I do when I’m pet. P: “It rests quietly on your lap for a moment.” D: I can imagine Toto just like – P: It’s asleep!D: Zzzzz. D: “Suddenly…it shoots away and crawls wildly on the walls!” (imitates crazed dog)P: Oh my god. D: Here we go – OHHHHH IT’S FAST. It’s fast!P: You can do it!D: It’s fast! P: Get out of the way!D: It’s fast – ohhhh, shoot. It’s “striking the wall with its claws”. Well, it seems really excited now.P: Yeah, it seems ready to play. D: Okay.P: “You throw down your weapon into the corner of the room.” D: I hope we get it back. Bloody hell. P: “The Amalgamate brings it back to you…”D: (snorts) P: Proudly!D: “Proudly?” (pants like a dog) P: “You repeat this process a few times…now Amalgamate is very tired.” “It leans its dripping, ‘amphorous’ body against you.” Oh! D: “Amphorous”? Is that how you pronounce that?P: I don’t know. D: “Amorphowse.”P: “Amophorous.” D: It’s “twitching affectionately…” P: We still can’t spare it!D: Oop, not ready for a spare yet. P: “You pet the Amalgamate.” “It starts to generate a strange…” D: “I Happiness Froth.” P: “Stage One Happiness Froth!” D: Oh, right, okay.P: That was it. (giggles). D: Not a “strange I happiness.” This is the worst dog ever. P: I’m disturbed by the noises. “You pet decisively. The Amalgamate seems to be satisfied by all this.” D: Okay.P: Oh, look at all the dogs! P: “Endogeny is contented.” “You won!” Well, that was the disturbingest dog I’ve ever seen. D: ALPHYS… …YOU HAVE A LOT TO ANSWER FOR. “ENTRY NUMBER FIFTEEN” P: “Seems like this research was a dead end…” “But at least we got a happy ending out of it.” “I sent the souls back to Asgore, returned the vessels to his garden…” “…and I called all the families and told them everyone’s alive.” “I’ll send everyone back tomorrow.” D: Alphyyyyys… P: What are you doing?D: Uh – you may have caused…the death…of…him. “ENTRY NUMBER SIXTEEN” P: (coughing) Sorry! (coughs) D: It made Phil cough. P: Wait, (cough) okay. “No. No no no NO NO NO!” Wow.D: Well, here we go, Flowey’s about to get loose. Ooo, should we go down there or go left first? P: I feel like it wants you to go into each room. D: Let’s see…P: OH MY GOD! WHAT IS ALL OF THIS STUFF?!D: That looks like… Does that look like the Flowey that we fought!? P: A bit, yeah, actually, it does. AAAAA! All right, save it, and then we get our health back, right? D: Wait. P: OH!D: Oh m – NO!! NO NO NO NO NO I WANTED A SAVE POINT! Ugh! P: “Smells like sweet lemons.” D: Is that the horse? It is! P: I feel like it’s partly the horse. D: (voice cracking) Wow. BOTH: “Lemon Bread”. P: “Scream.” (giggles) D: Yeah…”you called for help, but nobody came.” BOTH: “WELCOME TO MY SPECIAL HELL.” P: This is scary, I don’t like it – D: WHOOAAA – I’m literally gonna die, this is it.P: Oh no! D: Well, thanks, game, for betraying me with that – bloody – game over.P: Wow. D: “It cannot end now! Toto!” ♫ Stay determinnnnnnnnneeeeeeeee ♫ ♫ D ♫ I cannot believe they would betray us with a save point. P: I know! What a troll. At least you know how to dodge those teeth now.D: Yeah. God. Here we go. P: Hello? Shower creature?D: I’m moving slowly… Is this the thing that… …peeked up behind us and tucked us into bed?P: I feel like it is. It looks pretty weird behind that curtain.D: It’s shaking more rapidly. P: Key! Bink. So we’ve just got everything except for the bllllue key, right? D: Yeah, that wasn’t at all incredibly traumatizing. (cough) P: That was like P.T. all over again. D: Yeah, literally. Okay… P: Yellow keyhole!D: There’s the yellow hole, okay. BOTH: Click! D: Another note on the floor… …note on the ground…you can’t make it all out… P: “Under…sheets.” D: Well, we got that one. P: Yeah. D: Right, what are these books about? BOTH: “A bunch of VHSes.” D: Mostly cartoons. Mmm.P: This is the anime hub. This is where she watches Kitty Mew Mew. “They seem to be alphabetized…save for a few stray sticky ones.” P: …I don’t wanna know. D: Literally, what is that supposed to – ? Okay.P: What does that mean?! D: “There’s a VHS player with a few tapes picked out beside it.” “They seem to be labeled in a specific order.” “Will you watch one?” P: Yes! D: It’s gonna be The Ring.P: Tape one… D: Here we go… P: (generic American voice) “Pssst, Gorey, wake up.” D: Who the hell is this?P: “Gorey”, who’s that? D: …Asgore? P: Ooh, do you think this is Toriel speaking to Asgore?! D: From their bed?P: Yeah! D: Goooooosh, oh my god, Toriel called him Gorey! P: Do the voice, do the voice! D: (in a thick Welsh accent) “Gorey, wake up!”P: (giggles) Wait – I’m Asgore AND TORIEL. How is that gonna – P: Just be both! I’m just gonna sit and enjoy it.D: Okay, well, Phil, you just enjoy this, then. (both giggling) D: “Mmmm?” (deep Asgore voice) “What is it, dear?” “Er, and why do you have that video camera?” “Shh! I want to get your reaction.” “Gorey, dearest. What is my favorite vegetable?” P: I forgot how Welsh she wasD: “Hmm… Carrots, right?” D: “No no no! My FAVORITE vegetable is…” “Eda-MOM-e” P: lolD: Really? D: Edamame beans, but she’s a mum. D: Ed… mum…P: It’s a… it’s a good pun. D: That must mean that if she’s saying that she’s a mum…P: Yeah? D: And they’re not, like, crying and being depressed and talking about reaping souls D: then these tapes must be from when they were still happy familiesP: Oh! Maybe. D: Before the humans ruined everything!P: Yeah. D: All right D: (Welsh accent) “…get it?”(Both chuckling) D: Good pun! That’s why Sans likes her so much. D: (deep voice) “Go back to bed, dear.”D: (female Welsh voice) “No no! Not yet! He he he.” D: “Now, if I were a dog, what breed of dog would I be?” D: (deep voice) “Hmm… I don’t know, honey.” D: “What kind of dog would you be?” D: (Welsh female) “I would be…” D: “A… MOMERANIAN” (both laugh)P: Well, I’m laughing. D: Queen of puns! Yes, Toriel! D: “You sure are excited to have this child.” D: Aw, it’s before they had the child.P: Awwwww D: And everything is about to go so horribly wrong D: (deep) “You know, if you keep making jokes like this” D: “One day, you could be…” D: “A famous MOMedian!” D: Wow! Boom, boom! Asgore with the bants P: Its like a pun-offD: Rest in piece D: (welsh female) “Well, I’m going to bed” D: (deep) “Hey, come on Tori, that one was funny!” D: (welsh female) *laughs* “I know, I’m just teasing you” D: “Goodnight dear.” (deep) “Goodnight honey.” D: (welsh female) “Oh dear, perhaps it is too dark in here for the video to come out.” P: Oooh!D: Domestic bread times! P: I like- Bread times?Both: Bread times! D: You know what I meant! Right, whatever. D: Are they all just gonna be like, pre-pregnancy tapes then?P: I don’t think we should assume. D: Well this must be Toriel’s video camera.P: Yeah. D: Okay. “Okay Toto, are you-” D: Toto?P: So who- they’re speaking to us now so I don’t know who this is. P: “Okay Toto-“D: That can’t be *us* Toto. P: No! P: We are Toto!D: There was- no no, a lot of people said a lot of weird stuff in the last episode. P: Hm. Lets just read it as is.D: Okay, sure. P: “Okay Toto, are you ready?” D: Should we assume this is Toriel?P: Nooo I don’t think we should.D: Okay fine, fine. P: “Do your creepy face!” [Both scream, then laugh] P: “Oh, wait! I had the lens cap on.” D: DuhhP: “What? You’re not going to do it again?” P: “Come on, quit tricking me!” *laughs* D: So who was that?P: I don’t know what that was about! D: Who was playing with… some form of Toto? D: Okay, tape three.P: *silly voice* Tape three! D: We’ll just read them all generic, “H-“P: Oh no, is that Flowey? D: Well the only person we know that said howdy is Flow-P: HOWDY!D: *chuckles* D: Read it as Flowey even though I doubt this is, if this is Toriel’s video camera P: (texan) “Howdy Toto, smile for the camera!”D: Yeah I doubt that. P: No I don’t think so. P: (normal) “Ha, this time I got you! I left the cap on, on purpose!” D: OOOH *laughs*P: “Now you’re smiling for nooo reason! Heeheehee!” D: Punked. Ultimate prank compilation right there.P: Yeah. P: “What? Oh yeah, I remember!” P: “When we tried to make butterscotch pie for dad, right?” P: Ooh! Is this their child, maybe? P: Why are they with Toto?D: “When we tried to make butterscotch pie for dad…” P: Yeah.. Hm.D: They must be talking about… Asgore. D: And its Toriel’s video camera…P: Yeah. P: So this must be their child.D: So is this their- the child, the one that.. died. P: Oh yeah! D: Playing with… whatever Toto is. D: Okay whatever, this is confusingP: This is confusing D: Well what- what is their child?P: Uhh.. P: (High pitched) “When- when we tried to make butterscotch pie for dad, right?”D: *chuckles* P: I can’t be too Alphys-yD: No, right. P: “The recipe asked for cups of butter, but we accidentally put in buttercups instead!” D: Don’t feed your dad the bloody flowers!P: What! P: “Yeah, those flowers got him really sick!”D: Jesus. P: “I felt so bad, we made mum really upset!”D: Don’t make Toriel upset. P: “I should have laughed it off like you did. Um, anyway where are you going with this?” P: “Huh? Turn off the camera? Okay!” D: (deep) “Stop filming me, child!”P: Yeah *chuckles* D: So, why does Alphys have the goat family’s tapes? P: I don’t know! Yeah.D: ..Is what I’m wondering right now. D: Bit of a perv. But! She apologized. P: She watches everything.D: Tape four! D: Okay so who’s speaking now?P: I don’t know, we’ll just say it in a normal voice. D: Okay.P: “I- I don’t like this idea, Toto. Wh- what? N-no, I’m not… Big kids dont cry.” D: It must be the child! ‘Cause otherwise it- What is Toto peer-pressuring this child to do? P: Don’t smoke! “Yeah, you’re right.”D: Just Toto, puffing ’em out in the ruins. P: *laughs*D: Sorry, I’m ruining it. P: “No! I’d never doubt you, Toto, never!” P: “Yeah! We’ll be strong! We’ll free everyone.” P: “I’ll go get the flowers.”D: NO! D: Don’t get the flowers!P: Whaaat don’t do it! D: Toto from a- whatever, what are you doing? D: Okay… This is confusing, I hope this all gets filled in, P: I know.D: And then suddenly we have like a “Oh my god” moment. P: “Toto, can you hear me? We want you to wake up.” P: “Toto! You have to stay determined!” D: This sounds like a dramatic moment, but who’s sat there with a tape just like, “Yo?”P: *whirring noise* P: “You can’t give up, you are the future of humans and monsters…” D: No pressure. P: “Psst, Toto, please wake up. I don’t like this plan anymore.” P: “I.. I… No. I said… I said I’d never doubt you.” P: “Six right? We just have to get six.” P: “And we’ll do it together, right?”D: What is this about? P: I don’t know, I’m sure we’ll find out.D: Was Toto pretending to be dead? P: [unsure noises]D: They’re talking about the souls, what does that even mean? D: Okay, some seriously deep shit is going on right now. P: Okay king monster is right there so lets go save it again before we fight that.D: Pffft!